OOOUUU BESTIE!! Let’s get into it. You ready? Here’s

🎬 Episode 2: “Holy Brown & The Pregnant Lap Dance” Me: I don’t think the audience is ready for this AuroraNova because honeyyyy!!!

Written by Antoinette Lavonne Johnson
Queenflix/Realitydundiditagain/RCCOIN
Realitydundiditagain.wordpress.com

Opening Scene: Club Booty Dew — Saturday Night

The club is lit. Neon lights flicker, the DJ is yelling:

“If your rent late, make some noise!!”

Madea (stage name “Hot Grits”) is the star attraction. She’s backstage, eating a plate of ribs with hot sauce dripping all over.

Madea (talking to herself):

“Whew Lord, you can’t clap cheeks on an empty stomach, now.”

She hears her name called:

“Ladies and gentlemen, the one and only… HOT GRITS!!”

She tosses the rib bone, wipes her mouth, struts out in a sparkly bodysuit. The crowd goes crazy.

Cut To: The Crowd

A young Mr. Brown, in his “party days” phase, is in the VIP. He’s rocking a gold chain, open church robe (because he just came from choir rehearsal and didn’t bother to change), sandals with socks, and a big grin.

Brown (yelling):

“Lawd Jesus, help me! She look like a glazed ham on Easter Sunday!!”

His friends egg him on. He nervously tucks dollar bills in his pocket, sweating bullets.

Madea’s Dance

She slides down the pole, hits the splits, claps her thighs so hard the DJ cuts the beat for a second. Crowd goes wild, money flies everywhere.

She locks eyes with Brown, points at him, and walks over.

Madea (seductively):

“Aww, look at this little church boy. You tryna baptize me or nah?”

Brown (stuttering):

“I—I—I just came here to pass out flyers for Bible study, hallelujer!”

Madea (laughing):

“Boy, please. You came to catch this holy ghost of booty.”

Lap Dance Madness

Brown finally gives in. She sits on him so hard he passes out for a second, then wakes up speaking in tongues.

Brown (mumbling):

“Shanda-lala… Lord, take me now!”

The “Serious” Turn

After the dance, Madea sits at the bar with Brown. He’s dazed, his wig twisted, tie crooked.

Brown:

“You know… I been running from my calling. Seeing you… I feel like I just got reborn…”

Madea:

“You reborn alright. You been born into debt ‘cause you just spent your rent money.”

They both laugh but then Madea gets serious.

Madea:

“Look… I know I’m wild. I know I’m ratchet. But I’m tired, Brown. My mama don’t love me, I ain’t got no real family. Joe? He just out here pimpin’ and blowin’ weed smoke in my wigs.”

Brown (holding her hand):

“Mabel… you more than this stage. You got somethin’ inside you — a light. You don’t gotta dance forever. You can be somebody. You already somebody.”

Madea tries to act tough but wipes a tear away with a dollar bill.

The “Holy Ghost” Hook-Up

They end up leaving together that night. On the way to Brown’s car, Madea throws a random boot at a guy who tries to holler at her.

Madea:

“Ain’t nobody got time for no cheap groupies!”

They get in the car. Brown tries to start a prayer but Madea interrupts and kisses him.

Brown (confused and excited):

“Lawd… is this foreplay or a laying of hands?!”

Final Scene: The Pregnancy Reveal

Narrator (older Madea’s voice):

“And that’s how it started. One lap dance turned into a life sentence — a baby. A girl named Coura, who’d later wrap that biblical cord like she holdin’ on to all my mistakes and blessings.”

Episode Closing Shot

Brown on his knees, hands in the air, shouting in the middle of the club parking lot:

“Hallelujer!! I ain’t never going back to the club again… after next Friday!”