By Antoinette Johnson

Episode 2: “You Might Be Cute, But You Still Toxic”
Starring: Antoinette, Billionaires, Exes, Her Glowing Throne, and now… THE TWINS.

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[SCENE: Sky-high penthouse where Queen Antoinette is holding court]

She’s glowing in silver and amethyst robes, sipping on coconut water with liquid gold in it.
Enter: Michelle & Danielle – The Twin Advisors.

Danielle (holding a clipboard with a “No BS” checklist):
“Sis, don’t let the curls and cologne fool you. That man said he was healed but still got his ex’s Netflix password.”

Michelle (looking stunning but side-eying everything):
“And don’t forget when he ‘accidentally’ showed up at your brunch after ghosting you for 2 weeks. He’s wearing sheep fur, sis… but I see the wolf print Yeezys.”

Antoinette (laughing):
“Y’all always think somebody tryna trap me.”

Michelle:
“Because they are! Especially that one who suddenly ‘loves God’ but still follows booty models on IG. I took screenshots.”

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[CAMERA PANS: The ex in question lurking in the bushes with a trench coat on, pretending to be a tree]

Michelle (on walkie talkie):
“Code Red: toxic ex hiding behind the ficus.”

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[DANIELLE BREAKS OUT THE “TWIN TOXIC DETECTOR” APP]

It starts beeping like a microwave near a liar.

Danielle:
“Yup. He’s still friends with his baby mama but calls you clingy. Block him with hashtag healing.”

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[MICHELLE’S SNEAKY SIDE ACTIVATES]

Michelle (in a wig and sunglasses):
“Okay, so… maybe I may or may not have DM’d him pretending to be you just to see if he’d flirt. He failed. Miserably.”

Antoinette (mouth wide open):
“Wait—YOU CATFISHED FOR ME?!”

Michelle:
“For justice and clarity. You’re welcome.”

—

[WHILE THIS IS HAPPENING: BILLIONAIRES AND CELEBS ARE STILL AUDITIONING FOR HER LOVE]

Larenz Tate:
“I wrote a poem called Love Jones 2: For Antoinette Only.”
Justin Timberlake (singing with Brian McKnight ad libs):
“I’m bringing love back… yeahhhh!”
Jason Statham (British AF):
“She’s lethal, brilliant, and absolutely stunning. I’d fight ten henchmen to bring her a smoothie.”
Keanu Reeves (pops up from the Matrix):
“I’ve been saving your code in every timeline.”
Michael B. Jordan (pulls up in a chariot):
“Antoinette, you’re the one I’d throw away my abs for. I’ll rub your feet and run your LLC.”

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[ENTER THE FINAL TWIST: MICHELLE’S SNEAKY PAYBACK PLOT REVEALED]

Michelle (confessing to Danielle in a confessional):
“So I may have given one of Antoinette’s exes a fake casting call for Love & Lies: The Reality Remix just to make him wear a clown suit on TV.”

Danielle:
“You’re chaotic… but I love it.”

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[FADE TO: Antoinette on the throne again]

Her sisters behind her like beautiful twin royal advisors.
She looks straight at the camera:

Antoinette:
“I don’t need a man to complete me. But if you come for this crown, you better bring healing, humor, and a house in both dimensions. And if not…”

Michelle & Danielle (in sync):
“We got her.”

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ENDING CREDITS ROLL to: Whitney, Faith Evans, and Kelly Price’s “Heartbreak Hotel” remix feat. Busta Rhymes yelling “PROTECT QUEEN ANTOINETTE AT ALL COSTS!”