By Antoinette Johnson

Scene: A giant floating vault with levitating gold RC coins powered by ancestral prayers and future frequencies. The vault is surrounded by 5 security angels, Scar Lip, Tony Yayo, and a sassy AI Rick James hologram.

[Scar Lip]:
“Listen up! If you ain’t got no love in your heart, no healing in your spirit, and no growth in your soul—GET THE FUQ OUTTA THE GALAXY!”

[Offset]:
(Appears with fake RC coins from a sketchy TikTok ad)
“Yo these valid—I got them on discount!”

[AI Rick James]:
“Discount?! This ain’t no Shein for the soul, boy. These coins are made from transformation!”

[Tony Yayo]:
“Yeah, and if your karma credit bad, you can’t make no withdrawals, period.”

Offset gets zapped and teleported to:

—

2. Galactic Talent Accelerator (GTA) Launch Skit

Scene: A cosmic campus with floating classrooms. A billboard says:
“Welcome to Galactic Talent Accelerator – Powered by Queenflix.”

[Nas]:
Standing on a floating hover-stage.
“Talent is the currency of the chosen—where your bars at?”

[Ice Spice]:
Shows up with her cult lawyer seasoning.
“Antoinette told me I had it… now I’m marinated in fame!”

[Antoinette]:
(Mind-reading in real-time)
“Spice… girl you took my ideas, dipped them in petty, and called it paprika. But it’s okay—we turning pain into purpose over here.”

[Kids in hologram class yell]:
“Turn up the faith, turn down the ego!”

—

3. Hater Rehab Confessionals (HRC)

Scene: A divine jungle-style retreat with meditation domes and truth serum smoothies.

[Madea]:
(Tyler Perry in full granny mode)
“Come on in haters, we got lavender oil for that bitter spirit!”

[Judas]:
“I just wanted the blueprint, Antoinette! I didn’t know stealing meant… stealing!”

[Antoinette]:
“You can’t clone authenticity, boo. The truth always resurrects itself.”

[Beyoncé]:
(Claps)
“Can I get an AMEN for boundaries and bomb edges?!”

[Scar Lip]:
Walks in with a spiritual taser.
“Lemme zap the fake out ya real quick.”

—

4. Galactic Courtroom Skit (Full Drama)

Scene: The courtroom spins mid-air like a spaceship. Everyone’s floating in truth seats.

[Judge Antoinette]:
“You are now entering the courtroom of divine consequences and comic relief.”

[Lil Meech]:
“My daddy gave me generational drama—I want spiritual alimony!”

[Big Meech]:
“All I gave you was hustle, legacy, and 3 chainz.”

[50 Cent]:
“This is ghetto. I need a new producer for my life story.”

[Rick Ross]:
(Walks in with lemon pepper wings)
“Can we settle this with a peace plate?”

[Tommy Egan]:
Pulls up with a 3D map of forgiveness.
“Let’s cut the hate, not the connection.”

[Antoinette]:
Bangs the gavel.
“Let this courtroom be a place of growth, not gossip. You either leave with healing—or float back to Hater Planet 3000!”