SKIT: “Metaverse Mansion Cookout (No Pork, But Plenty of Drama)”

Setting:
The front yard of a sleek digital mansion floating on a cloud island — palm trees made of LED lights, grills that cook with moonlight, and Kendrick Lamar DJing with sound waves.

—

Scene Opens:
Antoinette stands at the head of the cookout table in her goddess glow, wearing a white sheer spiritual two-piece with gold laces and hoops that say “Purpose.”

Antoinette:
“Y’all better wash your hands with holy water ‘fore you touch my spiritual plant-based ribs!”

Kevin Hart (grabbing a vegan burger):
“Ayo who seasoned this? Cuz this Impossible Burger done turned me into a BELIEVER!”

Jamie Foxx (sipping watermelon mint water):
“Chile, this whole event smell like generational healing and cologne from the ancestors!”

Chris Tucker:
“I thought this was a cookout—how come the ribs ain’t got no bones in ‘em?!”

Katt Williams (on a hover-lawn chair):
“Because Antoinette is BONAFIDE BLESSED, Christopher. You can’t serve pork when your destiny pure!”

—

SURPRISE GUESTS pull up on a glowing hover-jeep:
Tichina Arnold & Martin Lawrence!

Martin (dressed like it’s still 1996):
“Hold up now, Antoinette! I ain’t come empty handed, I brought you this platinum vintage microphone signed by Pam AND Gina.”

Tichina (hugging Antoinette):
“And I got you a candle that smell like ‘Keep Going Sis!’ and a hoodie that say “Healed, Hood, & Holy.” You inspired me!”

Crowd cheers. Mos Def drops a freestyle about healing and sweet potato fries.

—

CUT TO: CONFESSIONAL BOOTH

(It’s shaped like a giant air fryer.)

Tichina Arnold (confessional):
“Listen. I came to this cookout with love in my heart and cornbread in my purse. But the way Katt looked at Martin when he asked for beef ribs? Baaaaby. The tension was sizzling!”

Chris Tucker (confessional):
“I ain’t gon’ lie… I asked Antoinette what was in the vegan mac and she looked me dead in my soul and said ‘Divine intelligence.’ I cried. I CRIED!”

Kevin Hart:
“I came here thinking I was the funniest dude… then I saw Mo’Nique hologram backflip into the potato salad. I’m humbled, man.”

—

TRANSITION TO: AWARD SHOW REWIND

Setting:
Queenflix’s red carpet but make it time-travel — every guest is wearing outfits from a different decade.

Narrator (Morgan Freeman AI voice):
“Earlier that week, before the cookout and before Joseline got banned from teleporting, THIS happened…”

Flashback to Rihanna, Beyoncé, and Foxy Brown arguing over Jay-Z again.

Foxy (snatching mic):
“I ain’t say I WANT Jay… I said I GAVE him bars and blessings back in ‘98!”

Beyoncé (in a shimmering gold suit):
“Well sis, let’s talk about 2025. And how you still mad you didn’t get that Roc-A-Fella pendant!”

Rihanna (eating pineapple):
“I’m just here for the vibes and a feature check.”

Antoinette (walking in between them):
“Ladies, ladies… this ain’t the BET Source Awards. This is Queenflix. And I don’t want y’all fightin’ over nobody unless it’s Kendrick and he left his shoes.”

—

End Scene: Mo’Nique peeks through the hologram cloud from the sky and winks.

Mo’Nique (heavenly voice):
“I’m always watchin’, and always petty. God said we could have fun too.”