METAVERSE MANSION AFTERPARTY: “The Roast of the Multiverse”

Presented by Queenflix & RealityDundidItAgain Productions
Scene: Floating digital mansion in the clouds, luxury coded in binary.

[The scene opens with a golden door that opens by itself — revealing velvet floors, robotic waiters holding hookah trays, and holographic chairs that twerk when you sit on them.]

DJ (Lil Jon as a hologram):
“OKAAAY! This is the REALITY AFTERPARTY — y’all better sip slow or get stuck in the metaverse!”

—

ENTRANCE: Kevin Hart, Jamie Foxx, & Chris Tucker walk in together

KEVIN HART (yelling already):
“WHY is this mansion bigger than my actual career in 2005?! And why did a robot just slap me on the butt and call me Lil Pocket Power?!”

JAMIE FOXX (laughing, doing impressions):
“Kevin, relax, man. That robot was programmed by Tyrese, okay? That’s his new hustle. Also… where the drinks at?!”

CHRIS TUCKER (high energy):
“I ain’t even know what app I clicked! I thought this was a Zoom meeting!”

(They all stop and see Katt Williams in the VIP throne with a gold hologram crown and an emotional support monkey named Lil Jerome.)

—

KATT WILLIAMS (cool and petty):

“Well, well, well… look who finally made it to the party with their ABC sitcom energy.”

KEVIN (laughing):
“Don’t start, Katt! I came in peace — and with bodyguards!”

JAMIE:
“Man, this party wild. I just saw Monique come in riding a cloud shaped like Oprah.”

CHRIS TUCKER (doing a high-pitched scream):
“I seen Jesus and Tupac in the kitchen playing dominoes!”

—

THE ROAST BEGINS (CONFESSIONAL STYLE):

KATT (confessional):
“I love these brothers. But let’s be real, this metaverse don’t lie. Jamie here tryna sing every five minutes, Kevin out here screaming louder than Siri, and Chris still looking for Rush Hour 4.”

KEVIN (confessional):
“I ain’t scared of Katt… I just respect his perm. That thing could slice a bagel.”

JAMIE (confessional):
“This party is wild, but I love Antoinette. Only she could bring us together like this… in space. With monkeys.”

—

SUDDEN SCENE TWIST:

A portal opens… it’s TI dressed like a deacon, talking about opening a spoken word section in the backyard…

TI:
“Expeditiously, I would like to commence a segment I call: metaphysical musings in a parallel particle structure.”

KATT:
“Boy, if you don’t sit down before somebody turns you into a TED Talk hologram…”

—

ANTOINETTE ARRIVES:

[She descends the grand staircase wearing a glittering crown that projects mini clips of her skits like a walking movie trailer.]

ANTOINETTE:
“I see the multiverse turned into a comedy roast. This is my kinda party. But y’all better behave, ‘cause next stop is the THERAPY EPISODE… and y’all gonna need group counseling and prayer.”

—

ENDING:

DJ Lil Jon:
“YEAHHHHH! If you ain’t laughing, crying, or glitching, YOU NOT LIVING RIGHT!”

Fireworks explode. Katt does a slow spin in his chair. Kevin accidentally activates the champagne drone.